FEELING CONNECTED MATTERS
Our Self-Care Tuesday group this week focused on where we go when we want connection. As a raregiver, it's very important both to feel connected to yourself and have connections with people who understand you.
Benefits of connection
We all need different kinds of connection, and the first kind is connection with yourself. By taking time to be quiet, you deepen your connection to yourself.
Being connected to yourself, gives you the ability to respond rather than react. It also allows you to access multiple intelligences, which makes you more discerning, intuitive and able to trust yourself.
Reconnect to yourself
It is useful to take time to reconnect to yourself and the fact that you matter. The time you spend on yourself makes a difference and your feelings matter. As a raregiver, it can be easy to forget about yourself and focus the majority of your attention on your Rare child or family.
Prioritize yourself
Many raregivers are challenged to make time and space for themselves which makes sense when your list has a million things on it. I suggest you make a date with yourself and put quiet time on your calendar.
Just as you would not skip a doctor or therapy appointment, don't skip the appointment you make with yourself. Honor yourself because YOU MATTER.
Connection with others
Having meaningful connections with others, supports you to find your way through your medically complex lifestyle. You need friends who “get you” and who are good listeners.
You may have friends who, unconsciously, minimize your experience or downplay it by saying things like "all kids go to the hospital sometimes.” Their experience with a neurotypical child is not the same as yours with your Rare child.
To educate or not to educate?
In some cases with people who are willing to learn, you may choose to educate them as to how they can relate to you in a way that is supportive.
You might invite these friends to ask you, "what can I do to support you?”
There may be people in your circle, perhaps even family members who are unable to support you in a way that you need. In this case, you may choose to take space and step away from certain family members as painful as this may be. .
What's most important is to be true to yourself. Give yourself permission to be as you are and remember it's OK not to be OK.
Please join us for our weekly groups. We are here to support you. You can trust others in the meetings are going through the same things that you are, and will truly understand.
Coming up next week – The Places we Go When We Fall Short
A common thread in our support groups has been the perfectionism, guilt, shame and embarrassment we find happening in our lives. This is normal. And practicing self-compassion allows us to be with these emotions and experiences in a different way. Come explore what it is to hold space for ourselves, welcome our feelings and better understand where we are coming from.
Please Join Us
You may not realize how much you need the Angel Aid community until you find it.
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We look forward to being with you soon.
