BIG CHANGED = BIG FLEXIBILITY

BIG Changes

What happens when your Rare child needs full-time care and you make the transition from being a paid employee in the workplace of your choice to being a full-time raregiver? What did you feel and were you able to maintain the connections that you had made in your workplace. What's sustained you during this transition? We asked ourselves these questions in our Women's Empowerment Circle this past Tuesday.

Sustenance comes from prioritizing yourself. 

It's important even though you might feel guilty or even though your husband says he can only work out at night and he needs to work out six days a week, that you find time to work out yourself. This might mean that you take two or three shorter walks in a day if you feel like you can't leave for a longer block of time. Take sips of self-care which will nourish you throughout your day. Self-care is a discipline. And remember, self-care is NOT selfish.

Create structures

The reality is that no one can care for your Rare child like you can, not even your husband or partner. They will care for your Rare child the way that they do it which means that you are asked to let go of control. One thing you can do is create structures to support your partner taking over so you can tend to yourself. Maybe you set out snacks or activities or leave them a written schedule of things that they might do. If you are going out of town for a night, be clear as to whether you would like the dishes done or the laundry folded as well as the children taken care of while you are away. Whatever they do, celebrate their wins. Encouragement and appreciation go a long way. You might tell them, “ I trust you. You can do this. I love you. I'll see you when I get back.”

Quality time

It's important that you take quality time for yourself and that you give quality time to your Rare child or children. When you're playing with them, just play. Very often, raregivers feel like they have to do it all (and they do), that said, giving your Rare child undivided attention is a gift of unparalleled goodness. Of course you can take care of your child and fold laundry or take care of a few emails, and being fully present makes all the difference. Multitasking is a myth and most of us do it even when the quality of what we're doing goes down because our attention is spread thin in many directions. Give yourself the gift of settling down and being present with yourself and then engaging with your wonderful family.

Coming Up Next Week: How Caregiving Impacts The Wheel Of Life

How are you spending your time and is it working for you to nourish you as a human being who is also a Raregiver? Typically, time and satisfaction correlate, but not always with a Raregiver. As a Raregiver, you could be spending too much time and energy on family and not enough in other areas, creating an unbalanced wheel of life. Let’s make note of the places where you may feel somewhat out of balance and hone in on where you can use your resources more wisely and where you need to ask for help. This will be a powerful session where you will discover new things about yourself and learn how to implement new ways of being that will support you as a whole person.

Please Join Us

You may not realize how much you need the Raregivers community until you find it.

Zoom Link: https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88974713173

We look forward to being with you soon.